Prospectus Hit List for May 27
Hit List for May 22
Hit List for May 29
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 | W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% | Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 | 23 | 23 | 22.2 | 20.2 | 20.4 | .512 | .532 | 29.8% | 22.0% | 51.8% | -2.9% | -7.3% | |
After five more homers this weekend, Mike Napoli is now hitting .333/.453/.739 against the Angels in his career, so perhaps sign him then send him to Hawaii on vacation. | |||||||||||||
2 | 21 | 24 | 23.4 | 22.5 | 22.6 | .476 | .456 | 0.6% | 3.3% | 3.9% | -1.4% | 1.4% | |
The good thing is if the Diamondbacks could trade their first overall draft pick for a bucket of dirt and grit, for the first time in a while, they might not do it. | |||||||||||||
3 | 22 | 23 | 20.9 | 19.0 | 18.2 | .440 | .420 | 1.1% | 2.3% | 3.4% | -1.0% | 0.2% | |
Braves: Trading Season! Dodgers: Draft season! Braves: Trading Season! Dodgers: Draft season! Braves: Draft season! Dodgers: Trading Season! Braves: Great we'll take Uribe thanks bye! | |||||||||||||
4 | 20 | 23 | 21.7 | 21.3 | 21.3 | .486 | .506 | 8.2% | 5.7% | 13.9% | -2.8% | -2.4% | |
The Orioles are appealing Brian Matusz's suspension on the grounds that the substance on his arm was pudding. | |||||||||||||
5 | 21 | 25 | 18.9 | 20.4 | 20.6 | .493 | .513 | 27.1% | 11.9% | 39.0% | -3.3% | -10.5% | |
Word is Joe Kelly and his 6.24 ERA might keep his rotation spot. It's like that tin sign in the Fenway clubhouse says, "Play slightly above turd level today!" | |||||||||||||
6 | 19 | 24 | 16.3 | 16.2 | 16.6 | .444 | .463 | 3.3% | 5.3% | 8.6% | -2.0% | -12.3% | |
Their season isn't going as they'd hoped, but as they say, it's not over until the White Sox players start attending Cubs games. | |||||||||||||
7 | 25 | 20 | 22.9 | 25.0 | 24.7 | .539 | .519 | 24.8% | 35.9% | 60.7% | -0.2% | 1.9% | |
By WARP, the Cubs' best player spent the first half of April helping Iowa win the Pacific Coast League title because you gotta have priorities. | |||||||||||||
8 | 19 | 26 | 18.6 | 20.1 | 19.8 | .446 | .426 | 0.4% | 1.6% | 2.0% | -0.1% | -2.8% | |
The Reds shut down Devin Mesoraco, as new medical data indicates it is harder than previously thought to play baseball with one hip. | |||||||||||||
9 | 20 | 25 | 21.5 | 23.9 | 24.0 | .504 | .524 | 11.0% | 11.3% | 22.3% | -1.8% | 7.7% | |
Statistically, the Indians' chances of fielding a batted ball is 0.675, 0.325 lower than their chances of having a racist team name. | |||||||||||||
10 | 18 | 26 | 18.1 | 18.5 | 18.3 | .434 | .415 | 0.1% | 1.1% | 1.2% | -0.8% | -0.6% | |
Nolan Arenado has a .737 OPS at home but a .986 OPS on the road. Imagine how good he'd be if he could just hit in the best hitters' park ever! | |||||||||||||
11 | 27 | 20 | 25.1 | 28.0 | 28.4 | .541 | .561 | 43.5% | 18.0% | 61.5% | 3.0% | -1.7% | |
The Tigers know they're supposed to be old and lousy, right? | |||||||||||||
12 | 30 | 17 | 26.7 | 27.5 | 28.1 | .536 | .556 | 40.6% | 24.6% | 65.2% | 5.9% | 8.2% | |
Luis Valbuena has just one fewer home run than Mike Trout—oh wait the Astros are good so I don't need to come up with patronizing semi-facts to make Astros fans feel less terrible about themselves. Yay winning! | |||||||||||||
13 | 28 | 17 | 27.7 | 28.0 | 28.2 | .536 | .556 | 30.8% | 18.9% | 49.7% | -4.4% | -1.0% | |
Jeremy Guthrie gave up 11 runs in one inning to the Yankees, which seems so typically Royals as long as the box score you're looking at isn't next to the standings. | |||||||||||||
14 | 28 | 17 | 28.5 | 31.3 | 30.2 | .619 | .600 | 79.0% | 14.8% | 93.9% | 0.3% | -2.0% | |
Jimmy Rollins has a .622 OPS so someone should tell him he's not on the Phillies anymore. | |||||||||||||
15 | 18 | 29 | 21.0 | 22.6 | 22.4 | .472 | .452 | 0.9% | 2.8% | 3.7% | -1.9% | -5.5% | |
With a .449 slugging percentage, the highest of any qualified batter without a home run, Dee Gordon has stopped answering Ben Revere's texts. | |||||||||||||
16 | 16 | 31 | 17.4 | 16.2 | 16.6 | .423 | .404 | 0.0% | 0.7% | 0.8% | -0.5% | -2.9% | |
[looks at standings] Guess it's time for Bernie Brewer to start drinking. Oh. Right. Nevermind. | |||||||||||||
17 | 27 | 18 | 24.5 | 20.2 | 20.8 | .476 | .496 | 11.4% | 14.4% | 25.8% | 3.0% | 11.0% | |
The Twins third order winning percentage is .459. The Twins winning percentage when facing Joe Kelly is 1.000. Eat that, third order winning percentage! | |||||||||||||
18 | 24 | 22 | 24.5 | 25.6 | 26.3 | .523 | .543 | 28.5% | 12.9% | 41.5% | 7.3% | -0.9% | |
Throughout recorded history, baseball teams are undefeated when someone named "Slade Heathcott" homers. | |||||||||||||
19 | 26 | 21 | 23.9 | 22.1 | 21.8 | .505 | .485 | 19.5% | 23.0% | 42.5% | -1.6% | -11.7% | |
Look, the Mets might win some games or whatever but Bartolo Colon will run the bases in our dreams forever. | |||||||||||||
20 | 17 | 31 | 23.6 | 25.8 | 26.1 | .494 | .514 | 1.2% | 2.3% | 3.6% | -1.3% | -2.7% | |
The A's record in one-run games is 2-13 but their record in one-pun games is undefeated. | |||||||||||||
21 | 19 | 29 | 17.4 | 18.6 | 18.3 | .397 | .378 | 0.2% | 0.2% | 0.4% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
After Ryan Howard's 10 homers, the next best on the team is three, shared by three players one of whom is Jeff Francoeur. If Worst Comeback Player of the Year was an award... | |||||||||||||
22 | 23 | 22 | 26.3 | 24.9 | 24.3 | .531 | .511 | 9.0% | 21.9% | 30.9% | 2.2% | 10.5% | |
Andrew McCutchen just heard you traded him from your fantasy team, so time for all the homerz! | |||||||||||||
23 | 22 | 25 | 22.4 | 19.7 | 20.5 | .489 | .469 | 3.5% | 17.9% | 21.4% | 1.5% | -8.6% | |
The Padres defense is the opposite of Swiss cheese in that the cheese parts are really small and the holes are huuuuge. | |||||||||||||
24 | 22 | 23 | 20.7 | 21.0 | 21.5 | .503 | .523 | 18.9% | 19.1% | 38.0% | 1.7% | 6.1% | |
On the plus side, Robinson Cano looks like a shoe-in to make the cover of Hot Garbage Illustrated. | |||||||||||||
25 | 27 | 20 | 24.7 | 25.3 | 25.2 | .536 | .516 | 16.8% | 43.9% | 60.7% | 5.3% | 18.5% | |
For Halloween, Hunter Pence dresses as Hunter Pence. He does a very convincing impression! | |||||||||||||
26 | 30 | 16 | 29.9 | 27.0 | 26.9 | .575 | .555 | 65.8% | 20.9% | 86.6% | 0.2% | 1.1% | |
The Cardinals are thriving without any help from Jason Heyward so imagine how great they'll be when they deal Heyward for Giancarlo Stanton like I did in my fantasy league—yes I'm in first place. | |||||||||||||
27 | 24 | 23 | 24.7 | 26.1 | 25.9 | .524 | .544 | 25.8% | 13.3% | 39.1% | -5.5% | -11.7% | |
It's so hard to poke fun at the Rays because all their notable personalities left town for better—oh there I did it. | |||||||||||||
28 | 23 | 23 | 23.0 | 21.9 | 22.4 | .492 | .512 | 9.5% | 12.8% | 22.3% | 1.6% | 15.9% | |
Every team has a winning streak now and again, but they all come to an end eventually. Remember that when the Rangers don't ever lose again. | |||||||||||||
29 | 22 | 26 | 26.6 | 23.5 | 23.1 | .498 | .518 | 10.3% | 7.4% | 17.7% | 1.5% | 1.6% | |
Josh Donaldson went 4-for-4 with two homers and five runs scored in last night's game but he'll never be Brett Lawrie. Unless he gets a tattoo of it. | |||||||||||||
30 | 27 | 19 | 25.6 | 25.7 | 24.6 | .564 | .544 | 78.3% | 9.6% | 88.0% | -2.1% | 0.5% | |
During the last two seasons, Bryce Harper has four stolen bases and has been caught stealing five times, said the guy desperately searching for a reason to dislike Bryce Harper. |
The one, the only, the Hit List.