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Prospectus Hit List for July 11
Hit List for July 10
Hit List for July 12
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
| Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 | W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% | Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 |  | 50 | 40 | 53.9 | 59.2 | 58.8 | .592 | .611 | 90.2% | 2.8% | 93.0% | 2.2% | 6.0% |
| Bruce Rondon with convenient spacing spells "Bruce Ron Don," which means the closer of their future is the sum of your three coolest uncles. | |||||||||||||
| 2 |  | 56 | 37 | 55.7 | 54.9 | 54.6 | .564 | .584 | 66.2% | 23.5% | 89.7% | 0.3% | -0.4% |
| Congratulations to David Ortiz for setting the record of "most hits without having to field." He will be rewarded with a golden dugout bench, and by "will" I mean "should." | |||||||||||||
| 3 |  | 52 | 40 | 51.7 | 54.6 | 55.0 | .556 | .575 | 21.6% | 45.6% | 67.2% | 4.0% | 26.5% |
| Ben Zobrist is continuing to show off his versatility. Sometimes he gets the game-winning hit. Sometimes he doesn't. He can do it all. | |||||||||||||
| 4 |  | 53 | 38 | 48.7 | 48.8 | 48.7 | .545 | .564 | 49.9% | 29.6% | 79.5% | -5.8% | 2.3% |
| I guess it's possible to say Yu Darvish is the "second person" on the disabled list. I'm going to keep nudging you until you get this joke. | |||||||||||||
| 5 |  | 54 | 38 | 52.5 | 51.8 | 50.2 | .544 | .564 | 47.6% | 33.6% | 81.2% | -4.0% | 9.0% |
| No truth to the rumor of Wednesday's game being delayed due to Bartolo Colon running out a groundball from Tuesday's game. | |||||||||||||
| 6 |  | 55 | 34 | 57.9 | 56.7 | 54.9 | .578 | .558 | 55.0% | 41.5% | 96.5% | 0.3% | 1.8% |
| They're last in the league in stolen bases, which will happen when speedsters like Pujols and Berkman opt for free agency. | |||||||||||||
| 7 |  | 44 | 46 | 45.8 | 47.8 | 46.5 | .535 | .555 | 2.5% | 7.8% | 10.3% | 1.3% | -0.3% |
| Look, it's Josh Hamilton's first multi-home run game of the year, which is totally worth another shampoo commercial. | |||||||||||||
| 8 |  | 51 | 40 | 52.4 | 54.0 | 54.0 | .565 | .545 | 15.1% | 65.4% | 80.5% | -1.5% | -11.6% |
| Shin-Soo Choo hasn't been hit by a pitch all month. If he doesn't get nicked by a pitch soon, he's going to forget how to feel pain. | |||||||||||||
| 9 |  | 49 | 42 | 45.6 | 42.2 | 42.7 | .525 | .544 | 6.2% | 26.0% | 32.3% | 7.9% | -0.6% |
| When do teams start considering intentionally walking Lyle Overbay with the bases loaded? | |||||||||||||
| 10 |  | 52 | 39 | 54.6 | 54.5 | 52.4 | .550 | .530 | 83.8% | 5.9% | 89.7% | -1.5% | -4.0% |
| First five games for Justin Upton: 5 home runs, 21 PA. Last 64 games: 5 home runs, 284 PA. Justin Upton clearly does more damage while under pressure to file his taxes. | |||||||||||||
| 11 |  | 45 | 45 | 42.9 | 45.2 | 44.2 | .548 | .528 | 54.9% | 2.0% | 56.9% | 8.8% | 20.3% |
| Their two most valuables players according to WARP are Hanley Ramirez and Yasiel Puig, each whom have played fewer than half their team's games. What a goofy team. | |||||||||||||
| 12 |  | 54 | 36 | 50.5 | 49.9 | 51.4 | .541 | .521 | 29.8% | 60.6% | 90.4% | 1.6% | -3.9% |
| It took the entire dawn of history, but they finally beat the Oakland Athletics in their 12th game against them. | |||||||||||||
| 13 |  | 47 | 44 | 47.1 | 45.3 | 46.0 | .500 | .520 | 8.7% | 9.6% | 18.3% | -7.6% | -19.2% |
| Nick Swisher didn't fall down, so it was a good day.` | |||||||||||||
| 14 |  | 50 | 42 | 48.3 | 47.2 | 48.0 | .498 | .518 | 5.6% | 16.7% | 22.4% | 1.5% | -20.4% |
| Manny Machado hit a triple, which was like a double that went through puberty. Here, watch this instructional video to see what your double is going through. | |||||||||||||
| 15 |  | 44 | 46 | 44.2 | 41.9 | 43.8 | .495 | .515 | 0.4% | 3.6% | 4.0% | 1.1% | -1.6% |
| Hi, you've reached the Corey Hotline. 4.95 loonies a minute. Here are some words that rhyme with Corey: Gory, Story, Munenori | |||||||||||||
| 16 |  | 47 | 44 | 44.5 | 43.1 | 42.9 | .517 | .497 | 14.2% | 15.9% | 30.1% | 4.9% | 15.0% |
| They went 0-for-16 against Philly this series with runners in scoring position, so it's all solo homers from here on out. | |||||||||||||
| 17 |  | 43 | 45 | 44.3 | 38.5 | 39.2 | .472 | .492 | 1.0% | 0.9% | 1.9% | -0.9% | -0.9% |
| Of course Greg Holland is their closer. If you remember back in history class, Holland is a monarchy. | |||||||||||||
| 18 |  | 47 | 44 | 46.5 | 43.9 | 43.9 | .504 | .484 | 32.1% | 3.7% | 35.7% | -8.5% | -2.2% |
| Heath Bell couldn't be less popular in Arizona if he left his sprinklers on all day. | |||||||||||||
| 19 |  | 40 | 51 | 38.3 | 42.1 | 42.3 | .462 | .482 | 0.0% | 0.2% | 0.2% | 0.0% | -0.1% |
| I reckon few would object to letting Raul Iba�ez bring a chair or stool into left field for those lengthy night games. | |||||||||||||
| 20 |  | 44 | 48 | 46.2 | 47.8 | 45.6 | .484 | .464 | 9.2% | 0.6% | 9.8% | 0.6% | -3.9% |
| No, this isn't a Wiccan altar dedicated to bringing Roger Clemens into the Rockies rotation. It's rude of you to assume. | |||||||||||||
| 21 |  | 40 | 50 | 39.4 | 42.9 | 43.8 | .482 | .462 | 3.0% | 0.5% | 3.5% | -1.3% | -8.9% |
| The good news for Matt Cain is the California state legislature just recently decriminalized "failure to complete an inning against the Mets." | |||||||||||||
| 22 |  | 35 | 53 | 37.1 | 38.1 | 36.6 | .440 | .459 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.1% |
| We're going to start calling Dylan Axelrod "The Poet Mechanic" until we change our mind or receive a cease and desist letter, whichever comes last. | |||||||||||||
| 23 |  | 40 | 49 | 43.4 | 44.4 | 44.6 | .477 | .458 | 0.0% | 0.6% | 0.6% | -1.1% | -0.2% |
| How does one sing "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" at Wrigley Field with the home team down 10 runs without sobbing uncontrollably? | |||||||||||||
| 24 |  | 37 | 51 | 38.3 | 39.5 | 40.0 | .429 | .449 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.1% |
| Aaron Hicks is starting to finally play well for a rookie, and extremely well for a balding rookie. | |||||||||||||
| 25 |  | 40 | 48 | 41.2 | 40.0 | 39.7 | .467 | .447 | 0.3% | 0.9% | 1.2% | 0.1% | 0.4% |
| How does a team go 10 below .500 at home and two over .500 on the road? Simple: the Citi Field home clubhouse is infested with gremlins. | |||||||||||||
| 26 |  | 45 | 47 | 40.7 | 41.7 | 42.0 | .464 | .445 | 1.7% | 2.4% | 4.1% | -1.7% | 1.4% |
| Cliff Lee throws 76 pitches, lasts seven innings, throws 12 balls, gives up four home runs, and we're supposed to believe this is true? | |||||||||||||
| 27 |  | 37 | 53 | 38.1 | 40.6 | 41.9 | .453 | .434 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.0% | -0.0% |
| Perhaps they should start filling their baseball bats with light beer. It wouldn't improve their offense, but it would get people's interest. | |||||||||||||
| 28 |  | 41 | 51 | 40.6 | 40.3 | 40.1 | .452 | .432 | 0.9% | 0.1% | 1.0% | -0.7% | -4.3% |
| If the ball gets trapped in Andrew Cashner's beard, the pitch should be a do-over. | |||||||||||||
| 29 |  | 32 | 59 | 31.6 | 27.0 | 29.2 | .360 | .379 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| A solitary Chris Carter will continue to mash home runs until someone notices. | |||||||||||||
| 30 |  | 33 | 57 | 34.3 | 31.8 | 32.3 | .394 | .375 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| "Jacob Turner Standup Triple" certainly needs to be a name for something. Does Pitbull have a backup band? | |||||||||||||
Lose yourself in the Hit List the jokin' you own it you better never let it go