Prospectus Hit List for September 12
Hit List for September 11
Hit List for September 13
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 | W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% | Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 | 50 | 96 | 54.4 | 48.1 | 50.6 | .348 | .366 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
If I'm doing this right, last night's sweep of the Mariners was only the Astros' second sweep. | |||||||||||||
2 | 54 | 90 | 58.2 | 53.8 | 54.7 | .383 | .364 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Jose Fernandez homered and Braves third baseman Chris Johnson got angry because Fernandez watched, but the Marlins got the last laugh because they’re in last place and no, wait, that’s not why. | |||||||||||||
3 | 58 | 87 | 62.1 | 61.0 | 61.0 | .418 | .437 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Adam Dunn: four at-bats, four strikeouts. Perfection! | |||||||||||||
4 | 62 | 83 | 66.9 | 69.7 | 69.7 | .463 | .443 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Anthony Rizzo struck out three times and walked because he doesn’t believe in the third true outcome. “Home runs? Sure,” he said after the game. “Show me a Sasquatch and I’ll show you a fly ball go over the fence.” He laughed. | |||||||||||||
5 | 62 | 82 | 64.5 | 67.7 | 69.4 | .458 | .438 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Silver linings are for losing teams and Donald Trumps bidets/drinking fountains. | |||||||||||||
6 | 65 | 81 | 60.3 | 64.8 | 63.9 | .435 | .455 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Do you think anyone would notice if the Mariners just went to the Seahawks game on September 29th? | |||||||||||||
7 | 63 | 81 | 60.5 | 64.0 | 63.9 | .437 | .456 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Down by 10-plus runs for six innings, Ron Gardenhire handed out just five at-bats to players who weren’t in his original starting lineup. NEVER SAY DIE!! | |||||||||||||
8 | 64 | 80 | 65.5 | 63.5 | 63.2 | .445 | .425 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
The Mets relievers, Wheeler, Black, and Hawkins, would make beautiful folk-rock together. | |||||||||||||
9 | 67 | 80 | 71.2 | 70.1 | 66.9 | .468 | .448 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
A cool nickname for the top three in the Rockies lineup, Blackmon, Rutledge, and Dickerson would be the Continental Congress. | |||||||||||||
10 | 66 | 80 | 64.6 | 69.8 | 70.4 | .464 | .444 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Yusmeiro Petit finally did throw that perfect game. Nice job! | |||||||||||||
11 | 66 | 78 | 62.2 | 62.5 | 62.7 | .440 | .420 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
There has to be a burger joint in greater San Diego that is developing a boxburger as we speak. | |||||||||||||
12 | 67 | 78 | 68.1 | 64.7 | 66.6 | .459 | .479 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Getting passed in the standings by the Angles shouldn't be humiliating. But it is. Oh, it is. | |||||||||||||
13 | 67 | 78 | 59.3 | 59.7 | 61.6 | .427 | .407 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Jonathan Papelbon struck out two for the save. He finished with an emphatic fist pump. The Phillies are 15 games out of the Wild Card. | |||||||||||||
14 | 69 | 76 | 71.5 | 73.5 | 72.6 | .494 | .514 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Mike Trout's second worst monthly OPS is .974. | |||||||||||||
15 | 73 | 72 | 71.8 | 69.8 | 69.8 | .490 | .470 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.0% | -0.6% | |
Returning from a road-trip, how many times do you think one of the flight attendants mutters to himself, “I have had it with these mother*ucking snakes on this mother*ucking plane!"? | |||||||||||||
16 | 77 | 69 | 77.5 | 71.1 | 72.0 | .510 | .530 | 0.1% | 5.6% | 5.7% | 2.5% | 4.9% | |
Not only did James Shields win an important game for the Royals, after the game he traded himself back to the Rays for Wil Myers. "I just want to help the team," he said. | |||||||||||||
17 | 76 | 69 | 72.8 | 75.1 | 73.6 | .513 | .493 | 0.0% | 1.7% | 1.7% | 0.1% | 0.0% | |
If the Reds finish the season 8-7, the Nationals have to go 15-2 just to tie them. | |||||||||||||
18 | 78 | 68 | 72.9 | 65.6 | 67.1 | .486 | .506 | 0.0% | 14.6% | 14.6% | 6.4% | 4.0% | |
In a win that kept the Earth revolving around the sun, the Yankees beat the Orioles. "Phew!" sighed environmental scientists. | |||||||||||||
19 | 77 | 68 | 77.1 | 75.1 | 76.0 | .526 | .546 | 0.0% | 8.9% | 8.9% | -2.7% | 3.2% | |
Chris Davis is one triple away from one. | |||||||||||||
20 | 77 | 68 | 76.0 | 73.8 | 75.4 | .521 | .541 | 0.2% | 19.4% | 19.6% | -4.3% | 6.3% | |
Statistics show when you have the same number of runs as errors your chances of winning drop by at least 3 percent. | |||||||||||||
21 | 78 | 66 | 75.5 | 84.1 | 84.7 | .560 | .579 | 0.0% | 62.8% | 62.8% | -0.7% | -16.2% | |
All it took was one first-pitch extra-inning pinch-hit grand slam and Roberto Hernandez went back to Fausto Carmona. | |||||||||||||
22 | 83 | 64 | 84.7 | 86.2 | 86.6 | .579 | .560 | 10.8% | 87.7% | 98.5% | -0.1% | 0.5% | |
There's something fitting about J.J. Hoover coming in to clean up after Mike Leake. | |||||||||||||
23 | 81 | 64 | 80.3 | 79.7 | 78.8 | .551 | .571 | 19.7% | 69.1% | 88.8% | -2.4% | -5.8% | |
Lost eight of 10? Quick! Trade Michael Young! What? You already did? Uh-oh... | |||||||||||||
24 | 84 | 62 | 90.1 | 96.9 | 96.2 | .629 | .647 | 99.7% | 0.2% | 99.9% | 0.2% | 0.3% | |
Welcome to everyone's faaaavorite game show, "Make Drew Smyly frown!" Hey, Drew! I don't like you! What do you think of that, huh? Pretty tough to take, eh? | |||||||||||||
25 | 84 | 61 | 83.7 | 82.9 | 80.9 | .572 | .591 | 80.3% | 19.4% | 99.7% | 0.8% | 2.9% | |
The A’s have 20 hits, three homers, and seven doubles and it’s only the sixth inning. (You think I’m staying up till the end of this? You crazy.) | |||||||||||||
26 | 84 | 61 | 77.6 | 80.5 | 81.8 | .558 | .539 | 24.1% | 75.7% | 99.8% | 0.0% | -0.1% | |
The Pirates have Justin Morneau and Marlon Byrd batting three-four in their lineup. The Pirates are 82-61. Contemplate that away from sharp objects and industrial equipment. | |||||||||||||
27 | 85 | 60 | 88.9 | 82.9 | 82.7 | .585 | .566 | 65.1% | 34.8% | 100.0% | 0.0% | 0.1% | |
The Cardinals are so nice they let themselves be no-hit for almost six full innings before kicking the crap out of the Brewers. A bunch of fine, upstanding fellas, they are. | |||||||||||||
28 | 85 | 60 | 81.1 | 84.4 | 82.4 | .574 | .554 | 100.0% | 0.0% | 100.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
If Brian Wilson pitches long enough he will become the first person to A) eat a live ball on the field, B) eat a live person on the field, C) B again | |||||||||||||
29 | 89 | 58 | 90.4 | 89.7 | 89.1 | .609 | .628 | 100.0% | 0.0% | 100.0% | 0.0% | 0.4% | |
What is it about men with fish names that they’re good at baseball? | |||||||||||||
30 | 87 | 58 | 87.6 | 86.1 | 82.6 | .592 | .573 | 100.0% | 0.0% | 100.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
The Braves got upset when Jose Fernandez watched his home run, which is understandable because when the Braves homer they put a blindfold on and feel their way around the bases. |
In which we twice use the word ************ but disguise it with only one *