Prospectus Hit List for August 19
Hit List for August 15
Hit List for August 22
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
| Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 |  W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% | Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 |  | 77 | 43 | 82.1 | 86.0 | 84.5 | .686 | .682 | 99.9% | 0.1% | 100.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| The Cubs have now won 40 games in a row. In an unrelated story, it sure is odd the Cubs have played the Brewers 40 consecutive times. | |||||||||||||
| 2 |  | 71 | 49 | 75.4 | 77.9 | 77.2 | .628 | .623 | 99.6% | 0.3% | 99.9% | 0.0% | 0.1% |
| Hey! Bryce Harper hit a 481-foot home run! But, anyway, as I was saying, he’s terrible. | |||||||||||||
| 3 |  | 67 | 53 | 70.7 | 74.0 | 74.3 | .596 | .601 | 39.2% | 45.4% | 84.6% | -2.9% | 22.3% |
| Are the Red Sox' starting pitching problems a thing of the past? Well, they haven’t played yet today, so sure! | |||||||||||||
| 4 |  | 67 | 53 | 67.8 | 73.9 | 73.7 | .589 | .584 | 70.6% | 24.8% | 95.4% | -0.9% | -0.2% |
| There are only 19 home games left, meaning just about 19 games left to listen to Vin Scully. Cherish this, people. | |||||||||||||
| 5 |  | 69 | 52 | 70.5 | 71.4 | 71.6 | .584 | .589 | 48.1% | 40.9% | 89.0% | -0.6% | 3.6% |
| Was Josh Donaldson’s dugout tantrum really about cologne? That's not the scents I get. | |||||||||||||
| 6 |  | 64 | 56 | 67.4 | 71.2 | 70.6 | .569 | .564 | 0.0% | 69.6% | 69.6% | 0.5% | 23.1% |
| The Cardinals have a 69 percent chance to make the playoffs. Make your jokes now. | |||||||||||||
| 7 |  | 69 | 50 | 70.0 | 70.6 | 69.4 | .586 | .591 | 94.7% | 3.3% | 98.0% | 1.0% | 3.1% |
| Mike Napoli is having his best season since 2011 in Texas. Doesn’t he know you’re supposed to get worse when you go to Cleveland? Better make sure he gets another copy of that memo. | |||||||||||||
| 8 |  | 67 | 54 | 65.7 | 67.9 | 67.6 | .554 | .549 | 29.3% | 53.2% | 82.5% | 6.9% | -7.9% |
| The Giants just can’t seem to win anymore. It’s like they’re the bizarro Giants, they only lose games they should win and their uniform colors are blue and white. | |||||||||||||
| 9 |  | 64 | 57 | 61.8 | 63.8 | 63.5 | .523 | .528 | 5.0% | 23.4% | 28.5% | 4.5% | -14.6% |
| Any day the Tigers bullpen doesn’t cause the Earth to fly off its axis and hurdle into the sun has to be a successful day. | |||||||||||||
| 10 |  | 64 | 56 | 64.7 | 63.7 | 63.4 | .533 | .538 | 11.4% | 29.6% | 41.0% | -9.4% | -0.9% |
| The Mariners were officially sold to new ownership but the press release says “nothing will change.” Hit List did research and that anagrams to A Chilling New Thong. Sounds ominous. | |||||||||||||
| 11 |  | 67 | 53 | 63.8 | 62.2 | 62.3 | .532 | .537 | 12.3% | 39.1% | 51.5% | 10.3% | 0.3% |
| If Zach Britton is really the best pitcher in the American League, how come he’s not starting for a team that effectively has no starters? | |||||||||||||
| 12 |  | 62 | 59 | 61.6 | 62.2 | 62.0 | .512 | .507 | 0.2% | 14.9% | 15.1% | -4.1% | -23.1% |
| Marlins comments are better when you add “dressed in a clown suit” after each sentence. So “Can the Marlins win with Alex Rodriguez?” becomes “Can the Marlins win with Alex Rodriguez dressed in a clown suit?” To which the answer is obviously YES! | |||||||||||||
| 13 |  | 60 | 61 | 59.4 | 61.6 | 61.7 | .501 | .496 | 0.1% | 11.2% | 11.4% | -3.4% | -7.6% |
| In retrospect the Mets should have limited Yoenis Cespedes’ opt-out to just the contract and not other things like meals, manners, and toilet paper. | |||||||||||||
| 14 |  | 58 | 63 | 62.1 | 62.1 | 61.5 | .504 | .499 | 0.0% | 1.1% | 1.1% | -0.1% | -0.9% |
| Rumor has it the Rockies have brought in some outside-the-box consultants to work on how to win in Denver, including a few chefs who have recommended mixing corn starch into their air. Research is ongoing. | |||||||||||||
| 15 |  | 61 | 60 | 63.4 | 62.3 | 61.3 | .512 | .517 | 0.9% | 5.4% | 6.3% | -3.4% | -15.9% |
| Jeff Luhnow doesn’t like no-trade clauses, but he doesn’t like trade clauses either. You can’t have it both ways, Luhnow! | |||||||||||||
| 16 |  | 50 | 69 | 57.3 | 59.7 | 60.8 | .479 | .484 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| In his first 1,243 plate appearances Brad Miller hit 29 homers. This season in 435 PAs he has 25 homers. In case you were wondering how Phil in accounting was kicking your butt in fantasy. | |||||||||||||
| 17 |  | 72 | 50 | 61.7 | 58.3 | 58.3 | .513 | .518 | 87.7% | 7.9% | 95.5% | 0.5% | 2.4% |
| Carlos Beltran thinks Texas is more about baseball than New York, though it’s easy to focus on baseball when there are no good pizza options. | |||||||||||||
| 18 |  | 61 | 59 | 55.9 | 56.9 | 58.0 | .483 | .488 | 0.4% | 3.0% | 3.4% | -0.0% | -1.4% |
| The Yankees rebuild was inspired by social media, which means lookout for some give-aways at Yankee Stadium inspired by your racist uncle Norman next season. | |||||||||||||
| 19 |  | 62 | 56 | 59.6 | 55.4 | 55.8 | .493 | .488 | 0.0% | 24.8% | 24.9% | 1.0% | 16.6% |
| The Pirates are 10-5 since selling at the trade deadline. The Pirates are basically Ron with the mustache down at the used car lot. | |||||||||||||
| 20 |  | 57 | 63 | 55.4 | 54.0 | 55.1 | .462 | .467 | 0.0% | 0.3% | 0.3% | -0.4% | -0.3% |
| Adam Eaton blowing a bubble while hitting a grand slam is perhaps the definitive case of inconsequential badassery. | |||||||||||||
| 21 |  | 49 | 72 | 52.1 | 54.7 | 54.6 | .435 | .440 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| If the Twins traded all their players and only drafted actual twins, they’d be much worse, but at least they’d be intellectually consistent. | |||||||||||||
| 22 |  | 61 | 60 | 56.6 | 53.8 | 54.5 | .467 | .472 | 0.2% | 1.6% | 1.9% | 0.4% | 1.4% |
| The Royals have reached a 0.0 percent chance to win the World Series this season. So they have us right where they want us. | |||||||||||||
| 23 |  | 50 | 71 | 49.2 | 51.1 | 53.0 | .420 | .415 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| The Diamondbacks front office. (get it?) | |||||||||||||
| 24 |  | 51 | 70 | 57.0 | 51.0 | 52.1 | .436 | .441 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| Are we at the point with Mike Trout where voters want to vote for someone else for MVP because they're bored? If so we need to get new voters. | |||||||||||||
| 25 |  | 52 | 68 | 51.6 | 50.2 | 49.3 | .423 | .418 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | -0.0% |
| The Brewers scored six runs on six hits and left nine runners on base. This just in: the Brewers are NOT the Mariners. | |||||||||||||
| 26 |  | 52 | 69 | 49.6 | 48.7 | 49.0 | .412 | .417 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| The A’s have attributed their success this season to cooping, the practice of attaching heated chicken coops to the body to stimulate confusion and pain. Which explains that. | |||||||||||||
| 27 |  | 44 | 77 | 44.1 | 48.2 | 48.4 | .382 | .377 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| Dansby Swanson had two hits in his first game so get your yacht and country club jokes ready, baseball world. | |||||||||||||
| 28 |  | 51 | 70 | 53.6 | 48.1 | 48.0 | .415 | .410 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| What’s it like to lose 15-1? Probably a lot like that double date where your date liked the other guy much better than you and when you went for popcorn they all left, except in this case, they stayed for seven more innings. | |||||||||||||
| 29 |  | 57 | 65 | 49.0 | 47.0 | 47.1 | .410 | .405 | 0.0% | 0.1% | 0.1% | 0.0% | -0.0% |
| Phillies fans gave ex-Phillie and current Dodger Chase Utley a huge standing ovation and he repaid them by homering twice, so probably the last time that ever happens. | |||||||||||||
| 30 |  | 51 | 69 | 48.3 | 41.3 | 42.1 | .381 | .376 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% |
| Did you know the Reds bullpen has the seventh best ERA in August? And further, did you know it doesn’t matter at all in part because they were so bad in the first half they effectively sunk the season? | |||||||||||||
This is the hottest, freshest Hit List on the market--but it won't be for long.