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Prospectus Hit List for May 16



by Matt Sussman

Hit List for May 13 Hit List for May 20
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

The jokes THEY don't want you to know about.

RkTmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

27

9

28.5

29.8

29.5

.689

.684

94.5%

4.3%

98.9%

-0.2%

-0.1%

The new edition of the Cubs are losing about once a week. In previous years, every Cubs game simply felt like a week.
2

24

14

24.4

24.5

24.0

.591

.596

59.4%

21.8%

81.1%

2.9%

13.6%

You know how some people say they retire, then come back part time? Maybe David Ortiz would be willing to DH on alternate weekends, provided they have a home game.
3

23

15

23.2

24.8

24.7

.588

.583

45.4%

33.6%

79.0%

-2.7%

-1.8%

Daniel Murphy is on a huge slump, going 0 for his last 1 to drop his average all the way down to a measly .400.
4

24

14

23.3

23.8

23.1

.573

.577

57.0%

21.5%

78.5%

-0.6%

-0.3%

Austin Jackson walked three times on Friday. For at least two of those plate appearances, he was not aware that he was up to bat.
5

21

16

22.6

22.9

21.5

.581

.576

48.2%

30.1%

78.3%

-5.0%

-9.3%

I can't help but think that Jim Henderson, who gave up the lead and the loss on Sunday in the seventh inning, still isn't completely over his latest Muppets show getting cancelled.
6

20

18

21.3

23.7

23.4

.579

.574

64.5%

13.6%

78.1%

-2.8%

1.0%

Next year, Vin Scully and Morgan Freeman will be playing cribbage somewhere and just narrate the heck out of each other's movements until one of them snaps.
7

20

18

23.7

24.7

24.2

.558

.553

2.9%

31.6%

34.5%

1.7%

6.8%

There was a fascinating argument in favor of the designated hitter in the National League in this month's GQ, authored by Matt Holliday's glove.
8

21

16

21.4

21.5

20.1

.548

.553

58.0%

10.5%

68.5%

-2.4%

-1.2%

The Mariners are now a staggering 0-1 when Adam Lind homers, doubles and drives in four runs. No doubt they will go to the film room and work on this.
9

23

13

22.0

21.7

21.1

.542

.547

12.3%

24.0%

36.3%

-1.8%

13.0%

Four of the five runs Darren O'Day has allowed this year has been on home runs, so if you want to play Candy Crush on your phone while fielding behind him, by all means go right ahead.
10

17

17

17.9

17.3

17.1

.536

.541

37.3%

27.2%

64.4%

-1.8%

-8.4%

It snowed in Cleveland yesterday and Joba Chamberlain has a 0.55 WHIP. Everything is interconnected.
11

19

20

21.7

21.2

22.2

.533

.538

12.0%

25.4%

37.3%

0.0%

3.9%

Without question, J.A. Happ is the best pitcher in the game who also sounds like he authored several college psychology textbooks.
12

16

19

16.7

19.4

19.9

.530

.534

12.8%

24.8%

37.6%

-4.2%

-17.1%

Matt Andriese became the 23rd pitcher to throw a shutout for the Rays. Related: do you remember Steve Trachsel was once a Devil Ray? Does Steve Trachsel remember?
13

22

18

20.3

20.5

20.6

.523

.518

26.0%

20.2%

46.2%

2.1%

7.8%

Seven innings of one-run baseball? Matt Cain is fixed! And all it took was a one-game sample size weighed against the rest of his season in the face of aging curves and declining velocities.
14

19

17

17.8

18.1

18.2

.508

.503

2.5%

28.9%

31.4%

4.5%

-4.1%

Gerrit Cole beat the Cubs then said they aren't the best team in baseball. Gerrit Cole has lost to the Reds this season, so maybe it's that team.
15

22

16

20.1

17.3

17.7

.493

.498

24.1%

12.1%

36.1%

4.2%

7.6%

All I'm saying is, Rougned Odor never punched anyone before Matt Bush showed up on the team.
16

20

17

18.4

19.4

19.6

.498

.493

4.8%

15.3%

20.1%

2.6%

1.6%

The Marlins should just announce that Ichiro reached 3,000 hits last Thursday, as if anyone would have the werewithal to fact check that.
17

15

24

16.8

17.5

17.3

.486

.491

12.5%

8.2%

20.7%

-3.1%

-4.8%

Maybe Carlos Gomez would be hitting better than .182/.238/.248 if the center field behind him would stop snickering and calling him "Fartlos."
18

19

18

18.5

19.6

20.3

.494

.489

5.0%

7.5%

12.6%

2.6%

1.6%

The Rockies swept the Mets! Somewhere, Mike Hampton noticed.
19

16

20

15.6

14.9

15.7

.472

.477

3.6%

9.3%

12.9%

3.2%

4.3%

It took until May 12 for Chase Headley to finally record an extra-base hit, and now he has three XBHs in his last four games and this is a serious problem. He can't stop. Call a doctor.
20

16

21

16.5

16.9

16.5

.469

.474

3.0%

6.6%

9.5%

1.6%

-5.2%

Congratulations to Warwick Saupold, the first hobbit to reach the major leagues. If anyone knows how to drag on a three-and-a-half hour experience, it will be him.
21

17

23

18.1

19.2

20.5

.476

.471

3.1%

3.2%

6.3%

-0.1%

-3.6%

Chris Herrmann started games last series at both catcher and center field. As everyone knows, you should never go full Brandon Inge.
22

18

19

16.4

16.1

15.3

.455

.460

2.6%

4.1%

6.7%

0.4%

-2.8%

Chris Young might miss two weeks on the disabled list, though with his height it's going to appear like he's out five weeks.
23

16

21

16.0

14.3

14.6

.436

.441

2.0%

1.7%

3.7%

-0.0%

-0.1%

Pinch-running guru Quintin Berry pitched for the Angels' Triple-A team Saturday night and threw a 41 mph pitch, and the Jered Weaver punch line is so glaringly obvious that I'm going to still make the joke. He taught him that pitch!
24

22

16

15.4

16.4

16.0

.443

.438

1.6%

7.2%

8.9%

-1.6%

1.9%

The Phillies are looking like a mortal lock to make the playoffs, assuming the playoffs begin June 3.
25

17

22

17.0

13.8

14.4

.434

.429

1.4%

1.9%

3.2%

-1.0%

-0.4%

"See, I told you it was a good pick!" Said a former Padres scout upon news of Matt Bush reaching the majors, before returning to his shift at the vacuum cleaner store.
26

16

22

13.8

13.6

14.2

.424

.429

3.4%

2.4%

5.8%

1.6%

-2.3%

Somewhere an A's fan went to the hospital with a moderate tummy ache and asked Danny Valencia to hit three home runs yesterday. Only explanation.
27

16

22

15.3

13.9

13.0

.426

.421

0.0%

2.1%

2.1%

0.2%

-0.9%

If you're looking for someone to vote into the All-Star game, consider Anyone Facing Wily Peralta hitting a cool .375 with seven home runs. Anyone Facing Wily Peralta made some great adjustments in the offseason and is in the best shape of their lives.
28

10

26

12.1

12.6

12.6

.408

.413

0.1%

0.5%

0.6%

0.1%

-0.1%

The Twins love going on road trips, because every time they show up the other teams are always so happy to see them.
29

15

22

13.6

10.5

11.4

.393

.388

0.0%

0.5%

0.5%

-0.1%

-0.6%

Not that the bullpen is the primary weakness of the Reds, but let's just say that Caleb Cotham's 6.11 ERA is actually helping the team bullpen ERA.
30

9

27

10.9

10.6

12.2

.359

.354

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-0.0%

0.0%

Accomplishments for the 2016 Braves:
1. Got the first runs of the season off Wade Davis
2. Got two runs off Wade Davis, just the third time that's happened against him as a Kansas City Royal
3. Haven't punched anyone